No reward without risk…

So the brief from the consultant surgeon regarding my osseointegration went like this…

“Mr. Reid, you are without a doubt the most high-risk patient to have this operation…. if it goes wrong you will end up in a wheelchair forever!”

After explaining the pro’s and con’s he asked do you still want the operation?

Fuck yes!

For me, the Reward far outweighs the Risk. I’m 41 this year my boy William is 5 in November I’m an old dad compared to my mates and I don’t want William missing out on anything growing up.

I believe I have about 10 years before I’m in a wheelchair anyway! This operation could give me another 20 years of being active and mobile and that’s what it’s about now for me… my boy, Taking him to a saints game, going the local for a few pints, showing him how to hang a door and put a shelf up the stuff my dad did with me.

Yes it’s a risk because if it went wrong I couldn’t do any of that but if I never had the operation I probably couldn’t anyway so it’s a no brainer, anyway, fortune favours the brave.

It’s going to be a good few months of hard rehab. Very hard being a 40 year old when most army blokes are counting down the days left! I will have to push myself to get fit and get my core strength as good as it was when I was 21 and doing sit-ups for fun. It will be a new way of walking and after 33 years.

The first time was hard enough and 8 years to get where I am now Even thinking of it is starting to make me sweat again! It’s also going to be tough being away from Claire and William for a few month after the operation and hard on Claire running the family home and her coffee shop.

It also comes at a great time in my life because October next year would have been 22 years in the army done and dusted. I have no doubt in my mind that if I had not been injured I would have completed my 22-year service in the Armed Forces and upon doing so would have been the longest serving member of my family but I think even at my 15 years of service I might have been anyway.

So after your 22 years, a new chapter starts in your life and I see this as no different only mine will start with a massive operation.

My future career has already started after meeting a guy called Gary and being offered a job in Manchester at helping organise events is part of my role. I also work for Saints RLFC my home town team which I always know as a lad I would sign for…:)!

The speaking, to be honest, has been put on the back burner a little bit as it was having a detrimental impact on my own mental health but I did recently do a talk for which was fantastic working with an international company.

It helped very much in the early years but now it’s making me question more choices I made and the reason why I made them on the battlefield and in my life. It was starting to affect my day to day life making me drink more and get angry. Going the bar till midnight then going clubs in town and not remembering getting home or who I spoke to even lashing out and assaulting some blokes for no reason other than being angry and pissed. I was getting out of control.